My Friends...

I Write This For You Guys...

All Of You Were There When I Was In The Dirt, You Were always there when I was depressed. You Guys Always had me put a smile on my face, thats right, my smiles weren't fake when I was with yous. I always just put the bad shit behind me whenever I'm with you guys, you guys make my life complete, you give it a purpose, you make it worth living. I Will never Forget You guys.

So In Return;

I Will Run out of my own boundaries for you, I would do all of my effort to make you guys smile when you are down. I Will be the one you guys need to go to when your down in the dumps. I Will Do All I can to make your lives worth living and to see your smiles.


No Words can Describe how much I'm grateful to you guys,

Thank You
So Much <3


Liam
Jason
Lisa
Brenda
Hiep
Ethan
And So So Much More

Time Away...~

Sigh, Today's The Worst Day ever...

I Got My School Report, My Dad Blasted at me for it, it wasn't good to him.
And I Just Got Nothing To Seriously Feel Happy About...
I'm A Failure.

I Just Feel So Down, I Feel Like My Life Is Falling Apart, Like I Have No Purpose.
My Friends Aren't Helping Either, They're giving me shit at a time when I need to fucking cheer up, But they're making it worse.

I Seriously Think I'm All Alone Now...

Back To When I Was Young, I Never Had friends, I was Alone, I never felt love from my Parents, I never made any friends.

It Was A Time Of My Life Where I Felt Nothing But Loneliness..

Right Now..

I Just Want To Get Away, Start Fresh, Become a new person, Find people to love and to be loved by...

Trapped~

Why...

My Friends are just pricks, they just fucking think about themselves most of the time, and I have to put up with their shit or I have no friends at all...
My Family Are Worse, They Give Me So Much Shit, and I can't do anything but take it. Cause The Last Time I Didn't take it and fought back...Dad almost had a heart attack. And I Can't let that happen.

I Guess I'm Trapped In A World Of Pain and In A World Of Hurt...

What Can I Do?

Wish...

I Wish For Someone Who Is Similar To me, In personality.
I Wish For Someone With A Heart, Not A Cold Blooded Bitch.
I Wish For Someone To Notice my Serious Side.
I Wish For Someone To Not Take Advantage of My Nice Side.
I Wish For Someone To Understand
I Wish For Someone To Talk To Me When I Need Someone To Talk To
I Wish For Someone To Laugh At My Jokes
I Wish For Someone To Not Be Angry At The Bad Things I've Done, But Help Me Get Over Them.
I Wish For Someone To Make My Life Worth Living
I Wish For Someone To Care
I Wish For Someone To Love...

Help Me...

Sigh,

I'm Used, I'm A Tool, I'm Taken For Granted.
This World Sickens Me, Everyone Just Doesn't Give A Shit. I Can Never Get What I Deserve, I Do So Much, I'm Unselfish.

But Why Does This Happen To Me?

I Know I'm Probably Gonna Have Someone Say "OMG EDWIN THERE'S PEOPLE IN WORSE SITUATIONS THAN YOU JUST SHUT UP YOU FUCKING SELFISH FAGGOT"

But I'm Not Gonna Care If I Don't Know Them, So Shut Your Cunt.

Anyway,

I Don't Know Who To Trust Now, I Just Get Things Thrown Back At Me. For All The Nice Things I Do...

I Do 1 Bad Thing, and it feels like the whole world's against me.

Sigh, Fuck This...

Someone Help Me...

I..
I don't know what to do now...

I wanna kill myself..

I wanna end my life...

I don't want anymore pain...

I can't trust ANY of my friends...they're never greatful for anything, They just say thanks and move on... They never showed gratitude.

My Mum and Dad give me shit at home, they call me a failure, an accident, a waste of human life.

Perhaps they're right, I can't do anything right half the time, I'm lazy, I'm easily distracted.

But I do care for my friends, I'd give my life for them...

I'm nice to everyone, I offer to help them sometimes, but they reject me in the most hurtful way.

People Call me a tryhard asian...

You Know What? If You FUCKHEADS who call me a tryhard asian, I'll tell you why I act full asian;

I grew up 2 years of my life in the phillipines, i ate rice and all.

And When my dad picked us up from australia, He always worked for 3 weeks. So I hardly got to bond with him. And So, I bonded with my Asian Mother and I did asiany things. That's why i act full, its my childhood habit, i grew up like this. So FUCK YOU TO WHO CALLS ME A TRYHARD ASIAN!

And What's worse, some people that i helped...called me a tryhard asian..for what i did for them...

They repay me with something that Just hurts me the most...

So now...

All I can think of...

Is Getting Away...

At Any Cost...Even Death....

Because I don't know who I can trust, or who to care for...

Thanks For Reading...<3

_-My Confession-_

This Is My Description Of The REAL Me.

I'm Nice
I'm Kind
I Forgive More Often Than Many People...
I Never Judge For Whatever Reason
I'm Always Judged For Minor Reasons
I Have been told I'm one of the nicest guys ever.
I Have been told I'm a rare type of person.
I Care For My Friends, I'd Die for them.
If I Had Someone, I'd treat her like the world...

Like..Seriously, It Would Be Undescribable.

I Go Out Of My Own Boundaries To Help Someone...

I Hate Being A Mean Person, I feel guilty For nearly everything bad i do, even if it was right.

I don't believe anyone deserves bad punishment,

I believe Everyone deserves a Second Chance..

But..

Why Does The Worst Happen To Me?
To Many People...
It Happens So Often To People Who Care, Who Give and Never Take, Who Sacrifice..

And This Is A Message To The People I Have Hurt...

I'm Sorry....


Thanks For Reading...

Prevented

I want you to see in my heart.
I want you to see in my soul.
I want you to recognize me.
I'm not..
I'm Not a ghost,

I May be to you,

but to me,

You are the stars that inspire me
You are the sun that brightens my day
A Moment without you is a waste of my time...
A Moment with you is the best moment of my life...

But Why Do You Prevent Me From Doing So?

It's The Question That I Want Answered...

But Will You Answer?

I Love You....

I Wish You Could See...
See Through Me...
See My Mind, My Soul...
That Being With You Makes Me Whole...

Angels Envy At Your Smile...
And To See It, I would Run More Than 100 miles...
Your Personality Is As Pure As Clear...
and Writing this Poem Just makes me want you here...

I Want To Hold You,
I Want To Kiss You,
I Want Your Touch
I Want Your Feel
I Want Your Love
Your Love That Is Real...




Edwin Kujawski 2009

Comment it yeah? ;D

Introduction UPDATE

This Is Just A Recent and more Detailed Bio Of Me.

My Name is Edward Lato Axel Kujawski Jr.

I was Born On the 8th Of March 1995.

I'm Part Filipino,Japanese and Australian.

I'm More On My Asian Side Since I Grew Up 2 Years of my Life in the Phillipines,
and When we moved to Australia, Dad Always had to work and I lived with my Asian Mummy :3

I Love Playing My Xbox 360 xD

I Like To listen to RnB,Hardtrance,and a little screamo.

I Value my Friendships and bonds quite a lot. I understand the true meaning of a true friend.

I Love to eat, omg, my appetite is massive O_O"

I like Poetry.

I'm Emotional, But I Can Stand Up For Myself.

I Know What I want in life, and I Will Achieve it! DATTEBAYO! LOL

I'm Not A Goody Two-Shoes At School, But I'm Not a full rebel, xD

I like magnums and potatochips...(AND EAT IT)

I <3 Death note and Anime...A LOT

According To My Friends, I'm Cool, and Funny ;D


Thanks For Reading...

Blog Part 2.

This Next Part is Dedicated to my Friends...

1.Liam Curtis Johnson

For 12 Fucking Years, We've stuck together, We're like spongebob and patrick....
Except We're Not Gay. LOL
You stood up for me all the time, against anyone, no matter if they were higher or lower than you. You Always Stook up for me, You taught me so many things, You made me..Me.

So Here's My Thanks For the 12 years of joy you brought to me.

I will stand up for anyone who picks on you, I will smash the fuck out of anyone who will threaten too. I'll Return the favour for the 12 years+

2. Hiep Nguyen

You Are Like A Fucking Brother To Me, Always There, Always Available.
Man You and I have had our fights, but who gives a fuck. Your My Fuckn Bro Man, I got Your Back. I Promise (Y)

3.Dylan (Shortee) Needham

You Sir, Are A Mad Cunt, Whenever I need to chill out, or need someone to talk to, I can just head down to yours. It hasn't one BIT been a boring moment hanging with you man...

(Y)

4.Lisa Nguyen

OMG 4!!!! My Ultra Mega Tall And Tank Twinette, You make me lol half the time on msn, We have so much things in common it's scary .___." But We're Just Epic/Cool Like That Aye? xP

I Promise I'll be there when you need it twinette <3

5. Peter Nguyen

You Are A SMART Boi!
You help me with my homework, and anything in the school category,
you make class fun. Your a Nigguh, ;D (Y)

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Kay Thats The End Of Part 2

Blog part 1.

Hello,

Been A While Since My Last Blog...

My Mood:

Confused/Dizzy/Suicidal.

Imm Write This With Several Parts...

First Up:

Friendship

What Is It To You?

Is It Just A Person That You say Hi to? and Talk to? Do You Consider That A Real/True Friend?

It's Not To Me...

A Friend Is Someone Who Would Get Out of Their Own Bounadries Just To Make Sure Your Okay, Just To Make You Smile...

A Friend is A Person That Will Make Your Life Worth Living...

Make it Complete...

But So Many Others Toss Away That Oppurtunity...

I Myself...

Have Valued The Friendships I've Had...

but The others have tossed it back at me, Treated me like shit
In return for all the things I've done for them.

It Hurts So Much...More Than Anything....

But So Much People Have Forgotten The Meaning Of A Friendship,
They Forgot what it means to have a bond. And They Don't Care If That Bond Was Cut...
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Sigh, Fucking Hell

I don't know why, But I'm so nice to people.

And When I am, They Start to drift away from me.

and Then When I stop being too nice, they call me a prick and an asshole.

I DONT GET IT, WHY DONT YOU PEOPLE EVER FUCKING BE HAPPY
WITH WHATEVER YOU GOT WITH ME.

I MAY SEEM LIKE A PUSHOVER BUT THAT GIVES YOU NO FUCKING EXCUSE TO EVER
TREAT ME LIKE SHIT.

NEVER TRUST ANYONE

I can't Trust Anyone in this pathetic world...

When I tell someone a secret, they spread it like swine flu...

Today, I had a conversation with someone, and then some randoms got on that person's msn account and saw the ENTIRE CONVO =__="

I can't trust anyone anymore.....

I'm Sick of it...

WHY

WHY THE FUCK DO I SEEM TO BE THE CENTRE PROBLEM

FOR EVERYTHING!!

EVEN WHEN I DON'T DO ANYTHING, THE BLAME IS PUT ON ME!

IM SICK OF THIS SHIT, IM TIRED OF BEING HITTED AROUND LIKE A PUNCHING BAG

MY OWN PARENTS PUT THE BLAME ON ME, FOR SOMETHING I WOULD NEVER DO!

IM USED ALL THE TIME!


ARGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!


I WANNA FUCKING SMASH SOMETHING/SOMEONE!

CAUSE NO MORE MR NICE GUY, IMA FUCKING KILL THE NEXT PERSON WHO BLAMES ME, FOR SOMETHING I HAVENT DONE!!!!

__________________

>> Edwin. Kujawski <<

I Need To Fill That Empty Space....

I Seem To Have A Great Life; Good Friends,Nice House,Good Education,I Get Everything I Want....

Well Your Wrong

I need Something to fill the empty space in my heart

Someone To Share My Happiness With

Someone To Love,To Care,Who Will Always Be With Me...No Matter What I Become

Maybe I Never Will Be Loved....Appreciated....

"I'm Sure You Will Find Someone"

I FUCKING HATE IT WHEN PEOPLE SAY THAT

DONT THEY KNOW THE PAIN I FEEL?

I DONT THINK SO, THEY JUST SAY IT TO EITHER WASTE THEIR TIME OR TO TRY TO MAKE ME FEEL BETTER!

YOU KNOW WHAT? DONT TRY TO MAKE ME FEEL BETTER!

UNLESS YOU KNOW HOW TO WITH THE WRITE WORDS

ACTUALLY PLAN TO MAKE ME FEEL BETTER, NOT JUST FUCKING WASTE YOUR VOCAL CORDS!

thanksforreading

Argh...I Can Never Keep My Mouth Shut

WHY CAN I NEVER SHUT UP? I ALWAYS SHOOT MY MOUTH OFF ABOUT THINGS LIKE A BLOODY KNUCKLEHEAD. ARGHH!! AND IM USUALLY THE QUIETEST PERSON IN THE GROUP. WHY? WHY CAN I JUST SHUT UP AND THEN PEOPLE WONT HAVE TO GET PISSED OFF?!?!?!

Old poem

To The one in my Heart.
When I met you at the very start.
You were happy, you were bright.
When I’m with you it always feels right.

If we were to be together or to be lying in the snow
I want you to know, I would never let go.
To see you smile or to see you laugh.
To know that our love will always last.

Time on you, I would spend.
Looking into your beautiful eyes, loving you until the end.
But Sometimes I Wish, you could see through.
Into my Heart and soul, that I actually love you.

Don’t Be Surprised or be alarmed.
If I was the one to protect you from harm.
Without you, I couldn’t even breathe.
I wouldn’t let you leave.

To Stop you from making the bad choices.
And When you listen to those voices.
Or when you are near those fears.
I will be there to dry those tears

Hearing that melodious voice that you have profound,
Ensures me that your safe and sound.
Seeing the reflection of the sea in your eyes,
Enriches your beauty that never subsides,

And here’s a Quick Message, to those who judge me.
I’m not always what I seem to be.
I’m Kind and Tender.
If I was loved I would be happy forever...

and to those out there, who fuck with me,
I will eat you,
Like how the decepticons thrashed bumblebee.

What you have just read.
Is what is always inside my head
when I’m happy, when I’m glad
When I’m Pissed or when I’m sad

I think of the one I love.
And Pray to the stars above.
Even Though She doesn’t love me back.
I know I’m On the Right track.

To Win her Heart.
I’ve been doing this from the very start.
And I will continue.
Until you see through.
My Heart and soul.
In the Certain area that says I love you.

And Thank you, who decided to spend their valuable time.
To Read what was in my mind.
When You could have talked on msn,
Or looked on someone else’s MySpace profile from there and then.

As I said before, never let your eyes deceive you.
Because My Heart and Soul are just as true.
As saying to her, I love you...

K, First Things First

My Names Edward Lato Axel Kujawski Jr :P

But Everyone calls me Edwin : ) Even My Parents -_-"

Well, I'm 14, I Go To BCC, It's an Okay School ^_^

I'm Filipino/Polish/Jap/English, the Filipino and Jap is from Mum's Side and The Polish and English is From my Dad's ^_^

I'm Addicted To Video Games, I've Got Every Next Gen Console (360.Ps3,Wii,DS,) Except PSP T.T

I'm The Laziest Fuck You Could Ever Meet, But Also The SMARTEST Laziest Fuck ;)

I Know My Shit When It Comes To Life, I've Had My Fair Share Of Struggles and Pain and Depression. yes I Know I Said And twice.

I'm Addicted To my Computer, I spend 3/4 of my life Playing My Video Games and Compute...and My Self Hawhawhaw...Nah jks : P

I hate Falling in love, Cause then i get depressed when i fuck things up, and then i make suicide attempts, and then i go to hell :S

yes Yes I'm religious, I'm Catholic :3

I'm Now part Blonde, cause I Bleached my hair, but only a part of it.

I Started this blog cause I'm bored and i like pouring my heart out : D